Compassionate Mediation/Martin Rosenfeld, JD

As a mediator, I attempt to work with my clients on an affordable fee program for their mediations. (See http://www.NJMediationWorks.com). A potential client once asked me if I would do a mediation with no cost. I responded in the negative. Why is that? Therapists will argue that a client who gets a service without cost does not value that service. That is not the cause of my decision to refrain from doing a no-cost mediation. The parties need to feel that time is of the essence in reaching an agreement. When matters drag too long it becomes increasingly difficult to get to Win-Win.

This notion is similar to the religious belief many have that death and dying is actually a form of blessing bestowed upon mankind. If we did not have numbered days, how likely is it that we would perform the tasks we need to perform? After all, if I live forever, why do something now. I can do it in one thousand years! By paying for mediation, and feeling a sense of exigency, parties are more motivated to look for solutions and try to attain Win-Win.

I was once asked by a Legal Service office if I could allow a mediation to proceed by not charging their client and asking the other party to pay for the entire mediation. I said that this was not fair as mediation needs to be shared by both parties. The Legal Aid office then wrote to the State of NJ to express their displeasure with my decision. The State supported my point of view on this matter. Mediations need to be highly focused, driven by a motivation to seek solutions, and shared by all who will participate. Indeed, compassionate mediation is necessary, but there must be a sense of a shared journey for the parties involved.

Advertisements